CHOSEN BY FATE
"Gohan go do the laundry,"
"Gohan while you're at that, can you hang it out on the line,"
"Gohan get the groceries,"
"Gohan go vacuum the house,"
"Gohan mop the floor,"
"Gohan do the dishes,"
"Gohan put the dishes away, can you also dry them too,"
"Gohan go study,"
THAT WHAT I DO EVERYDAY! I do everything around the house while, Mum sits and cries to herself about Dad going missing.
I haven't had the chance to do that at all. Mum doesn't let me because she only notices her own pain. It's the same with the rest of the Z fighter's. Only one of them I've been able to talk to and only they understand.
They haven't heard one word I've said or at least tried to. It hurts a lot. Especially when the ones you love can't be there for you when they need you.
I keep telling myself that everyone will be back to their normal selves soon. Shouldn't they let me grieve? I'm fatherless and I'm only a child. They wouldn't understand
"Hi, Master Roshi," I whispered in the house with no-one else inside.
"Hi, Gohan how are you holding up?" Master Roshi looked at me with sad eyes. I shook my head, "not well ha? I can't believe how right your father was about this. He kept trying to convince me that the others would stop paying attention to what is important he got that right." Master Roshi looked angrily thinking about what Daddy said.
I choke out, "I can't-I can't deal with this. No-one listens anymore. I spend my whole day doing everything besides cooking and I need time to myself. I made a promise to Dad and I can't keep that. I can't train either and I can't calm myself down." I needed my Dad here. I needed Daddy to be here, the one person who always knew what to do for every situation. But why? Why did he go away?
Now he only person who is listening, he watched Daddy as he grew up, strange isn't it? He gets to watch me grow too. He may be just an old pervert but, at least he was there for me; he listened when no-one else would.
"Son, get away for a while," He spoke, "Come here, I'm willing to deal with your mother. I'll teach you a few things while you're at it. Tell ya what," I looked at him curiously. "If you can't handle it at home come here and we can go somewhere," He grinned, "you may have passed my level but, there are things I can teach you." Master Roshi declared.
He looked so serious and I knew what I wanted. I would rather be there then anywhere else.
He is the only thing now that is keeping me going. Master Roshi is the only one now who is giving me hope and faith that I need to get through this without my Daddy but, I miss and need him so much.
"Are you sure?" I asked
"Come whenever you're ready. We'll go for a couple months; you've got to be ready for the androids. You need more experience and besides you father knew you could always come here if what he feared did happen." Master Roshi explained. I can't believe it though Dad knew this would happen?
"Okay, I'll come soon." I nodded.
"Gohan, come here." I walked over to Master Roshi. I felt my eyes watering. I couldn't stop it at all. I hugged him.
"I miss Daddy so much." I cried into singlet. He hugged me.
"I know Gohan, I know."
I really want to get away. It's still light outside but, I'll wait until dark. I've got everything packed and I know when I walk out the door I'm not looking back. There is too much pain, and I have to got to have sometime to figure this out.
Some time later
Its dinner time, the only time when I actually get a break and I get to do my second most favourite thing in the world: eat.
I think everyone who knows me, knows what my most favourite thing is. It is the one thing Mum doesn't like me doing; fighting.
I have a passion for it but, she doesn't encourage it. She should but, won't. All she does is blame that monster .
And Piccolo is not a monster, he is my friend. Can't she understand now I need a friend, I need a mother, I need a Daddy!
"How are you studies going Gohan?" Mum inquires wiping away tears. She's been crying for weeks, will it ever stop?
The question in remains, when can I show tears, when I can I show weakness?
"Fine Mum." I answer as I grab more food to eat.
I wish the awkwardness would end and she would completely understand but, she won't.
"Good, tomorrow you'll go over some trigonometry." Mum declares.
"Okay," I nod, than put down the plate on the table indicating I've finished eating.
Taking my plate to the sink, Mum starts doing the dishes. She picks up a plate slowly and grabs the sponge and starts washing it. Tears start coming out her eyes, all I can hear from her is a whimper.
After an attempt to clean three plates, she looks at me, "I'm tired, can you do the dishes and put them away." Mum asks but, it was more a command.
"Okay." I say plainly as mum goes to her room and shuts her door. She's probably crying herself to sleep.
I go into my room instead of doing the chores. I check I've packed everything I need into a bag; clothes, shoes, socks, underwear.
I grab a piece of paper and a pen. I quickly write a letter for Mum to see when she gets home. Boy is she not going to be happy, but she needs to know
It's been weeks since Daddy's been gone. I know everyone wants me to be strong, or is that what wants everyone see? I'm not Mum, I haven't been able to deal with Dad leaving since I found out.
Everyone has been so ignorant. Everyone had ignored me. And don't deny it Mother you have. You've made me do nearly everything around here while, you cried feeling sorry for yourself. Guess what Mother? I tried to not feel sorry for myself but, it is really hard when you're expected to clean, study, not do anything you please and most of all not have the privilege to grieve because your own Daddy is gone.
I made a promise to him and I haven't kept it. I need to train but, you don't clearly understand Mum. The androids are coming soon and Daddy has been taken away by someone. I need to help. What if that day came tomorrow? I couldn't do anything, I'd be useless.
Please don't bother finding me or have anyone chase after me because I need to clear my head for awhile. I need to let myself be free. I need to keep my promise. I don't know how long I'll be gone, but, I'll be back eventually. Don't worry I won't be alone.
Please Mum, go back to being normal. None of that crying stuff please and I'll give you a big hug when I get return, for however long I'll be gone.
See you for while Mum,
I am glad I finally wrote it.
I open my window and run out the house. I'm finally going to be free; finally I can clear my mind. Off to Master Roshi's it is.
Maybe now, my voice will be heard; loud and clear.